If Elizabeth Barrett Browning Were Alive Today

Facebook Timeline, how do I hate thee? Let me count the ways.
I hate thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when attempting to locate a hidden post I just posted yesterday
But has vanished in one of those stupid side columns.
I hate thee to the level of every unnavigable page
Most maddening complexity, by smashed monitor and shattered keyboard.
I hate thee freely, as men hate stupid, pointless changes;
I hate thee purely, as we are given no choice to opt-out.
I hate thee with the passion once put to use
In my old calls to AOL customer service in India.
I hate thee with a hate that seems to grow
With every extra button I must now click, hate thee with the fury,
Shouts, locked pages, of all the Internet!--And, if God choose Perdition,
I shall but hate thee better after death,
Because Timeline is the official social networking application in Hell.