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Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Please leave your latest anti-government tirade after the beep

Here's part of the background of all our lives which even I, with my intense loathing of all things government, never gave any thought to until very recently:

Beep!  Beep!  Beep!  Beep!

What worthless bureaucratic nitwit on a Quixotic quest to prove his relevancy decided that every truck and piece of heavy construction equipment has to shriek like a nuisance alarm clock every time it's thrown into reverse?

If you can't see the bulldozer backing into you, if you can't feel the rumble of the bulldozer backing into you, if you can't already hear the bulldozer backing into you, you were likely going to get flattened by the bulldozer anyway, even if it wasn't screaming that unholy beep as it flew breathlessly at you at a breakneck four miles an hour.

At some point some government committee decided to mandate this "safety" feature.  Since then, how many millions have been sucked out of the real economy and sluiced into the bleeping box business?

But bleeping boxes save lives, you heartless fiend!  Think of the children!

And there's where I lose.  It's an argument based purely on emotion.  Oh, I'm sure there were studies with blindfolded test subjects who said, "You know what?  Why, yeah, I can hear that horrible pterodactyl shriek better than the low engine rumble."  Of course you can.  But there's no way to prove beyond a rigged study that the addition of a bleeping box has saved a single life in the real world.

Unfortunately, there's also no way to argue with emotion, and logic loses every time.  And so, thanks to a team of faceless bureaucrats lounging around in the bowels of some government building we paid for, the daily symphony of our lives has a little more demented piccolo, and a little more money has been transferred from the productive sector of the economy and thrown down the bottomless government-mandate rathole.

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